Thursday, October 25, 2007

reality

reality hit me hard. really hard. after two years.

much as i would like to deny it, i think i'm still living in denial.

when jason said "your ex...", i felt like i received a slap in my face.

it was then i realised i've never seen it in that way.

everytime i talk about him i use his name. i don't say "my ex". and it's not like i was even conscious that i didn't use that term all this time.

it's been 8 weeks now, and i still cannot believe it has really ended. maybe that explains why i never use the "ex" word. i'm still hoping i'm just in this really huge nightmare and i'd wake up from it soon.

this is the first time i'm taking a break up so badly. i'm usually over it in like, a week? but this time i find myself pining. what has gotten into me? =(

i miss him. will we ever be back together again? i wish we would.